Evaluating Venues, Part II

You might remember the struggle we once had to find the perfect Charleston, SC venue. (If not, here's a refresher: Evaluating Venues...) Oh how I wish this wasn't such a task for brides. I've known a few that have an exact venue in mind for their wedding, or who can host a reception in a family members giant (and gorgeously manicured) backyard, but for the most part, finding a venue is the most stressful part of planning a wedding. This is good and bad for brides. The bad part being that you cant book other vendors, or mail save the dates, or even set a date until this task is complete. Literally all aspects of planning can be frozen until you know where everything will take place. This is stressful for the creative brides that want to get on with the fun parts of wedding planning. The good news, however, is that this is one of the first items on your to-do list. Get it done and over with and its pretty smooth sailing after that. So, this post goes out to those of you who are stuck on this little step.

I am a firm believer that you should love your venue. I'm not saying that it is going to be the exact picture you have in your mind, but if you cant shake the lingering feeling of 'Im not really sure about this', do yourself a favor and cross it off your list. Notice I said 'if you cant shake it'. That feeling is pretty much instantaneous when you see a venue for the first time because it isnt exactly like the picture you've worked up in your mind. So what do you do?

1.) Don't stress.
I'll say it a million times if I have to. You are getting married, you will find a venue, and everything will be fine. At the end of the day, you've married the man of your dreams and the fact that you didn't like the wall paper in the dining hall will not matter a single bit. So, why stress? Keep things in perspective like this and you'll enjoy planning your wedding so much more. 

2.) Be open minded. 

That little made up image is going to transform as the planning process goes on. Sometimes the changes will be subtle. The changing fall leaves in your imaginary background may not look too bad when they're still bright green and full. Sometimes the changes will be big. You might have your mind made up for an outdoor ceremony -- until you lay eyes on the most beautiful little chapel you've ever seen. Whatever the case may be, you have to be willing to let that idea transform into something more realistic. Try to imagine your wedding at that venue and see what you come up with.

3.) Flexibility is key.

You are going to have to bend a little when it comes to finding a venue. Much like letting go of that mental image, you will have to be flexible for other reasons. If you find a venue that you really love, you might have to change your date. They may only have a morning ceremony time available. The grand exit with sparklers that you really wanted, might be out of the question for some venues. It can definitely be a give and take process, so be prepared to bend a little. 

4.) Consider your budget.

The budget rule for your wedding dress also applies to the venue. If you know it's out of your budget - don't put yourself through the inevitable heartache (or debt!) by trying to make it work. If you have a budget in place, stick to it. Now, I will say that most venues offer discounted rates during the off season or for Thursday, Friday, or Sunday weddings. (Please see number 3).

5.) Be creative.

Sometimes the places you would never think to look make the greatest wedding venues. They don't necessarily have to be wedding venues. If you like the space, it doesn't hurt to ask. Most people/businesses would be flattered by the idea of hosting a wedding. With a good coordinator by your side, you can work up a contract that is comfortable for you and the owner. 

Do you have any tips for finding a great venue or dealing with the stress that goes with it? Leave us a comment below - we'd love to know your thoughts! 

The Greatest of These

     As a wedding assistant, I bear witness to as many as six weddings in a single weekend; each one different from the last, reflecting the character and personality of the couple that planned them. There are also those weddings that reflect something else; something far more beautiful than any florist or musician or photographer can create. Something that captures the essence of what marriage is. It reflects the true, unconditional love that only some people have really experienced.

A love that is patient and kind. 

It does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. 

It does not insist on its own way.  

It is not irritable or resentful. 

It does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. 

It's a love that bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things.
1 Corinthians 13:4

     Those weddings bring me to tears before the music even cues up. They are so filled with that unconditional love, where God's presence is so undeniable, so omnipotent, you know they have found true love and have found it through the one truest example of love. 

     So, as you plan your wedding and all the little details that make it yours, I challenge you to consider the idea that your wedding isn't just about you and your future husband or wife. It isn't about the font on the programs or the color of the flowers in the bouquets or even that gorgeous gown. Marriage is a covenant between three people: you, your future spouse and God. His presence will fill the room with overflowing emotion, joy, and beauty. It will be seen in the beauty of the flowers, the in the smiles of the family and friends that surround you and in all of those little details that make your wedding your own. His presence will make your wedding ceremony so beautiful and vivid, just like the love you have for each other.

We love because he first loved us. 
1 John 4:19